Man, what an exciting sports weekend in this area! Football kicked off in a huge way with the 'Skins showing what they're bringing to the table this season — and that's a big, heaping plate of RGIII. Between Griffin and a Redskins defense that brought Saints quarterback Brees to his knees, the team took it anything but easy on the Big Easy and gave weary Washington fans a reason to feel hopeful for the first time in ages.

Or so I hear, anyway.

I did not watch one minute of the game because, as I've mentioned before, I'm not much of a sports fan. This is unfortunate, because it leaves me with a lot less to talk about with my friends and relatives — many of whom are completely rabid sports fans. My sister-in-law is the very definition of a sports buff; my closest girlfriends would not dream of missing a Kentucky, Broncos or Syracuse game; and my cousin is so devoted to the Washington Capitals that her four children all have names beginning with letters that spell out C-A-P-S.

The fact that so many people know and talk about sports, particularly this time of year, means that at some point I will begrudgingly have to learn to enjoy them, too. But I can tell you one thing: It won't be any time soon. Because it is an election year, I already spend enough time yelling at my television set without adding sports into the mix.

So it is a testament to their persistence that my husband and some friends actually convinced me to join a Fantasy Football league this fall. (Although, in my defense, it was presented as a "fantasy league" which I incorrectly assumed was something entirely different. And which may explain my choice of Benjamin Bratt as a first-round draft pick. And the white rocks around my mailbox.)

I did manage to make it through the two-hour drafting process, and based on the results of this week's game I can announce I did so successfully. I beat my opponent thanks to my top points-earners, whom I have listed below, along with the actual reason I gave when drafting them for my team:

• Julio Jones: 22 points. "Fun name to say, based on the two long 'O' sounds"
• Tom Brady: 17 points. "Married to Gisele Bundchen. She dated Leonardo DiCaprio, which makes Leo and I practically BFFs."
• Ahmad Bradshaw: 14 points. "Any offspring of Terry Bradshaw has to be a great player."

True sports fans now hate me, I realize. And I'm OK with that, as it seems to pave the way to sports success.

Just ask Dan Snyder.